Thursday
Aug252005

Forever Inc. the script

>h20 tells me scripts look like ass on blogs. He's probably correct on that one, but I'm trying to find an artist for my next project and people don't like to open email attachments. So, consider this a script sample from the GREAT Dennis Hopeless:

Page one – 4 panels

[1] High angle shot of a moderately bustling city. This is the cool part of town. Coffee shops, club wear boutiques and pretentiously named bars provide the playground for not-as-hip-as-they-want-to-think twenty somethings. I don’t care what city we’re in, but if it were KC, this would be Westport. Somewhere in the panel, RYAN is walking down the sidewalk. He’s wearing an untucked dress shirt (probably not white) with the sleeves rolled up, boot cut Gap jeans with black combat boots and white oversized DJ headphones (they’re white to match his iPod).

Caption 1: “Looking back, I knew better.”

[2] Tighter shot of Ryan walking. This can be from any distance that works. It may just point out which pedestrian we’re following, or if you did that in panel one, it may be a close-up of his legs. I have a feeling your vision of this page will surpass mine.

Caption 2: “Nobody gets a woman like that and lives to tell the tale.”

[3] Even tighter shot that signifies RYAN stopping. Someone has caught his eye. We can’t see her yet, but RYAN can and he likes what he sees.

Caption 3: “But, I’ve never had what you’d call BETTER judgment.”

[4] Close-up of RYAN’s wide-eyed expression as he glimpses the girl he never knew he always wanted.

Caption 4: “Besides . . .”

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Page two – 5 panels

[1] Extreme close-up of KALI’s lips. Maybe she’s biting the bottom one just a little.

Caption 1: “There was something about her”

[2] Smaller panel floating in between 2 and 3 of KALI’s hand dropping a coin into the slot of a soda machine.

[3] Close-up of KALI’s midriff. Just enough flesh peaking through to show of her pierced navel.

No Copy

[3] Another small floater of KALI pushing the plastic soda selection button with the heel of her hand.

No Copy

[4] Tight shot of KALI’s ass pointing directly at us as she bends to grab her soda from the vend slot.

Caption 2: “Something I liked.”

[5] Another small floater near the bottom of the page of KALI’s hand pulling out the bottle.

No Copy

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Page three – 4 panels

[1] Wide shot of KALI with her head tilted back taking the first drink from of her soda. This is the first time we see all of KALI and should convey at least some of the “sexiest thing I’ve ever seen” imagery that has undoubtedly consumed RYAN. Think of that Cindy Crawford Pepsi commercial from the early nineties. This is at least somewhat voyeuristic. If need be, maybe RYAN’s gawking silhouette is lurking in the foreground.

Caption 1: “I should have realized much sooner”
Caption 2: “Long before her fangs pierced my neck”

[2] Close-up of RYAN as he either furrows his brow or rolls his eyes.

Caption 2: “Only evil-”

[3] Close-up of RYAN’s iPod as he presses STOP. The little illuminated screen reads:
Love at First Bite
AUDIOBOOK
00:05:47

[4] Wide shot of the front of Kali’s shop as she goes back inside. The lonely soda machine is all that’s left for RYAN to admire. Just for reference, we still haven’t seen any signage indicating that this is a tattoo shop. RYAN is about to find this out, and I want the reader to learn it when he does.

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Page four – 3 panels

[1] High angle shot of RYAN standing on the other side of the street holding his iPod out in front of him.

RYAN: Damn.

[2] Tighter shot of RYAN staring at the ground (or his shoes or the sky) deciding whether or not to go after her. If you have a better idea of how to portray this, use it.

No Copy

[3] Wide shot from behind RYAN as he crosses the street, heading toward what he doesn’t know is a tattoo shop. The headphones are now resting on his neck and he’s stuffing the iPod in his pocket as he walks.

No Copy

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Page five – 1 panel

[1] This is our introduction to KALI’s world. I’m not sure how to convey this on the page, so I’ll leave it up to you. If it takes more than one panel, that’s okay. RYAN is standing stock still in the doorway. KALI is standing off to the left, looking bemused by but not particularly interested in what RACE is saying. RACE is stomping around in the middle of the lobby, ranting. LEX is sitting in a rolling office chair leaning against the wall to the far right. LEX (the only one who seems to notice RYAN) is looking at him from over his hardcover edition of Stephen King’s Dark Tower 3: The Wastelands.

RACE: I Just don’t understand why the guy thinks he needs to stay the night just because I had sex with him.

KALI: He was having an epileptic seizure, Race.

RACE: So? He can have it somewhere else.

KALI: That’s one way to look at it.

RACE: It’s not like I invited him over for a damn slumber party. Besides…

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Page six – 5 panels

[1] Extreme close-up of RYAN’s somewhat shocked somewhat scared face. His eyes are wide and his mouth is hanging slightly ajar.

RACE off panel: He smelled funny.

KALI off panel: Race. Customer.

[2] Large panel serving as the backdrop for the page. A graffiti style painting on one of the blank walls that reads: LIFE IS PAIN, LIVE A LITTLE. All of the other panels on this page float around this central image.

No Copy

[3] Close-up of the business end of a tattoo machine. Try to make it look as menacing as possible.

No Copy

[4] Close-up of a Bio-Hazard Sharps container.

No Copy

[5] Close-up of a glass milk jug full of money and the sign taped to it that reads: Tip Me or I’ll Hurt Ya.

No Copy

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Page seven – 3 panels

[1] This is the first of three long vertical panels. It features a full body shot of RACE standing with her hand on her hip looking disapprovingly at RYAN.

RACE: Hey there, Abercrombie. What can we do for you today? Wait, don’t tell me. Tribal armband?

[2] Tight shot of LEX, still sitting in the office chair. He may or may not be reading his book while he talks.

LEX: Not to dissuade you from that phenomenal suggestion, but genital piercings are a shocking 35% off. Today only.

[3] Tight shot of a still shell shocked RYAN standing in the doorway. His head is cocked and he’s motioning back over his shoulder with his thumb.

RYAN: Yeah, I uh . . .

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Page eight – 3 or 4 panels

[1] Wide shot of KALI (probably leaning over the counter) grinning at RYAN. The expression on her face is warm but amused.

KALI: Please ignore the HELP. They’re good at what they do, but shouldn’t really be allowed to . . . talk. What can we do for you?

[2] Wide shot of a not quite relaxed, but now smiling, RYAN.

RYAN: I’m just kind of . . . looking.

[3] This is a time lapse wide shot of KALI crossing the shop and retrieving her portfolio book. Because we haven’t worked out the shop layout yet, I don’t really know how to describe it. It will basically consist of one large static panel with KALI drawn in several stages of movement across it. If this doesn’t work like I envision it, it can be split into more than one panel.

KALI: Well, we’re what you call a custom shop. Which means we don’t have a bunch of overdone flash to choose from. So, apart from Race’s ever shortening hemline, there’s not much for you to look at. But, in case you ever do find yourself in the market for a custom piece . . .

[4] Small floating panel featuring an extreme close-up of RACE’s ass. If possible, I’d like to work this image into KALI’s monologue so that the reader hits it right as she’s saying “ever shortening hemline.” If it won’t work this way, we’ll think of some other way to tie it in.

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Page nine – 3 panels

[1] Tight over the shoulder shot of KALI standing in front of RYAN holding a 3-inch photo album with FOREVER INC. painted on the front.

KALI: Why don’t you take a look at our portfolio?

RYAN: Sure.

KALI: Oh, and I’m Kali.

[2] Close-up of RYAN’s sheepish grin.

RYAN: Ryan. Nice. . . to meet you.

KALI: Likewise.

[3] Tight shot of RYAN flipping back the portfolio cover.

No Copy

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Page ten and eleven – two page splash

[1] Tight shot of the interior of the portfolio book. Instead of splitting it into panels, we can just make the photo mounts (those little fancy black corners that hold pictures in photo albums) and picture edges split up the pages. It shouldn’t be perfectly straight, and his hand is partially visible. There should be a sticker at the top of the page with RACE written on it. Each of the three artists will get a portfolio page, so the name sticker should represent them.

PICTURE 1: Head shot of RACE. She should be making one of her ridiculous facial expressions. Any of the pictures I sent you will work.

PICTURE 2: New School hip piece. A pair of revolvers with pink grips. (I’ll send you reference photos for the tattoo styles).

Caption 1: Race likes New School.

PICTURE 3: New School chest plate. Stylized coffin with neon green background and negative space bats flying out on both sides.

PICTURE 4: Fish’s Belly tattoo. New School Sumo wrestler standing in wrestling position. He shares Fish’s belly button and takes up most of the space below the sternum.

Caption 2: Bold lines

PICTURE 5: Kali’s knuckles. Stylized pink lettering of the word HOPELESS.

PICTURE 6: Grenade neck piece. Bright green and wrapped in a banner that reads GO BOOM.

Caption 3: and bright colors.

PICTURE 7: Gold boxing glove shoulder cap. Two gloves hanging together by their strings.

PICTURE 8: Molotov cocktail forearm piece. Green beer bottle with a rag sticking out the top and bright flames running up the arm.

Caption 4: What she lacks in social graces.

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Page twelve and thirteen – two-page splash and 1 panel

[1] Basically the same as the last two but held at a slightly different angle. If you want, you might throw in one of KALI’s hands pointing at FISH’s picture. FISH sticker in the top left corner.

PICTURE 1: Headshot of FISH. He’s tilting his head slightly to the left with a shit-eating grin and one of his hands in the foreground giving thumbs up.

Caption 1: Fish does most of the oriental work.

PICTURE 2: Koi half-sleeve with an oriental wave background.

PICTURE 3: Severed head half chest plate (covers most of one pec). Blue-green skin. Black and red blood.

PICTURE 4: Dragon back-piece. Winding oriental dragon in greens and purples.

PICTURE 5: Geisha girl with fans on a man’s ribs. White face, small red lips surrounded by a water lily background.

Caption 2: You like this style?

Caption 3: Honestly? It’s not my thing. But Fish does it really well.

PICTURE 6: Demon mask forearm piece. Black and grey.

PICTURE 7: Samurai calf piece.

PICTURE 8: Female chest plate made up of oriental flowers.

SFX: Just take those old records off the shelf

[2] Two shot of KALI and RYAN standing close to one another, while he holds up the book. The are glancing at one another quizzically.

No Copy

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Page fourteen – 3 panels

[1] Medium shot of FISH sliding into the lobby from the other room. He’s sporting black eighties-style Ray-Bans, slightly saggy underwear, and a pair of holey tube sox (I’m thinking the kind with stripes at top, maybe two different colors with 3 stripes on the left sock and two on the right sock). Nothing else. He is obviously making homage to Tom Cruise in Risky Business. KALI and RYAN can be visible in the foreground (one way or another). If LEX is visible, he should be cracking a slight smile from behind his novel.

SFX: I’ll sit and listen to ‘em by myself.

KALI: Fish . . .

[2] Extreme close-up of FISH pulling down his glasses and noticing, to his horror, that they have a customer.

Caption 1: Say hello to Ryan.

[3] Same shot as panel one, but this time FISH is running back to the other room. His nearly naked backside is still visible. LEX has dropped his book to his lap and is holding a hand over his tearing eyes as he laughs.

FISH: You didn’t tell me we had customers.

KALI: When would I have done that?

FISH: It’s one-o-clock in the afternoon on a Monday. What the hell is a customer doing here?

KALI: It’s Tuesday.

FISH: Exactly!

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Page fifteen – 5 panels

[1] Medium shot of KALI and RYAN. Both are grinning and RYAN is still holding the portfolio.

KALI: That. . . was Fish.

RYAN: I see. Quite a bod on that one.

KALI: Well, he works at it.

[2] Small floating panel of the a portable phone ringing on the counter.

SFX: BRNNG BRNNG

KALI: Excuse me for just a second (this dialogue will extend down from the previous panel)

[3] Tight shot over RYAN’s shoulder. He is shamelessly checking out KALI’s ass as she walks away.

[4] Medium shot of KALI looking over her shoulder and catching him. She looks playfully shocked and appalled but is still grinning.

[5] Tight shot of RYAN snapping his eyes down, pretending to look at the portfolio.

RYAN: Wow.

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Page sixteen – full-page splash

[1] This is the first page of Kali’s section of the portfolio. It should be laid out similarly to the previous portfolio pages, but only one is shown. To make this work, you may need to shrink it down enough to show the binding and the first part of the following page. Maybe turn the book at a harsher angle for this effect. As before, a KALI sticker should grace the top left corner.

PICTURE 1: Headshot of KALI smiling but looking somewhat sheepish about having her picture taken.

Caption 1: Forever Inc. Tattoo and Body Piercing. This is Kali.

PICTURE 2: These pieces are going to look like living collages. I’m guessing the final imagery will take some thought and more than one conversation. I’m going to describe the theme of each and we’ll go from there. This one is a full back-piece featuring a pile of burning books, maybe classics maybe popular. Somewhere there will be a fire extinguisher (maybe in the foreground spraying out more flames). The flames may be affecting the surrounding skin.

Caption 2: MmmHmm

PICTURE 3: A flowing piece that starts in the middle of the chest and spills out onto the shoulder and chest. It is a toolbox dumped on its side with the contents fanning out across the skin. Tools, a rubber ball and a crushed pack of cigarettes.

Caption 3: No, sounds totally do-able. But, the thing is, there’s no way for me to give estimates over the phone.

PICTURE 4: A high-end camera caps the shoulder, facing backward with the film spilling out and winding it’s way down the arm. Overlapping photos (some black and white some color) lay atop one another filling the background and completing the sleeve.

Caption 4: Yeah, just come down to the shop. We’ll take care of you.

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Page seventeen – [4] panels

[1] Medium shot from just behind RYAN looking across him at KALI. She is holding the phone out in front of her, pushing the OFF button with he thumb.

RYAN: These are incredible.

KALI: Thank you.

RYAN: I didn’t even know you could- What’s YOUR style called.

[2] Tight shot of KALI leaning one arm on the counter and looking slightly embarrassed.

KALI: I don’t really have a particular “style.” But I call those . . . the ones in there . . . snapshots.

[3] Low angle tight shot from below Ryan, looking up. He’s holding the book down slightly and looking across the room at KALI.

RYAN: Oh, like photos. Because they’re so realistic?

[4] Medium shot from above RYAN and KALI. Both are standing in approximately the same places and poses as previous panels.

KALI: Mmm, no. It’s like I take a picture. The perfect picture, of the person and turn it into a tattoo.

RYAN: Oh . . .

KALI: I try to take everything about a person and shave it down to a single image. God, that sounds pretentious . . .

RYAN: No, it’s awesome.

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Page eighteen – 3 panels

[1] Long vertical panel framing a tight shot of RYAN looking thoroughly intrigued. He’s holding the book down and closed, but his hand is stuck between pages marking his spot.

RYAN: How long do you spend with each person just, you know, figuring out . . . Everything?

KALI: Believe it or not, not long at all.

RYAN: Is it like an interview, or they bring in photos?

KALI: It’s much simpler than all that. I don’t do much . . . well any planning. I just sit down and tattoo them.

RYAN: I . . .

[2] Another long vertical panel. A tight shot of KALI standing in front of the cash register using her hand gestures to emphasize her speech. She is trying not to smile too big, but is amused by RYAN.

KALI: I’d explain it to you if I could, but I don’t get it any more than you do. And, if I’m not mistaken, I won’t have to. You want one, don’t you?

[3] A final long vertical panel. An extreme close-up of RYAN’s face. His eyes are wide and his mouth is hanging slightly open but . . .

RYAN: Yeah . . .

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Page nineteen – 4 panels

[1] Close-up of Kali’s machine’s and inkbottles as she sets up her station for the tattoo. Her hands should be in the shot, lifting and shaking inkbottles or putting on latex gloves.

Caption 1: I think I do.

[2] Medium shot from above of RYAN sitting in the tattoo chair and KALI sitting next to him setting up her station. There should be one of those overhead dentist lights obscuring the shot.

KALI: Before we officially get started here, I do have one interview question.

RYAN: Shoot.

KALI: What’s with the headphones?

[3] Tight shot from KALI’s perspective of RYAN pulling off the headphones. He’s looking at them like he had forgotten they were there.

RYAN: Oh, I uh . . . listen to audio books while I walk. Trashy horror novels mostly.

KALI: I see.

RYAN: Should have lied, shouldn’t I?

KALI: Yeah, maybe.

[4] Tight shot of KALI from RYAN’s perspective. She’s holding her tattoo machine and smiling at his geekdom.

KALI: But look at it this way, if you end up with a naked vampire on your back, at least we’ll know why. Now lose the shirt.

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Page twenty – 4 panels

[1] Low angle shot from below RYAN’s shoulder. He’s bent over a massage chair (I’ll get you a photo reference) looking at the floor, all you’ll see is his hair and shoulder in the foreground. KALI is leaning over him with her machine in hand, smiling.

KALI: You ready?

RYAN: Umm . . . Sure.

[2] Small square panel. Close-up of KALI’s foot pressing the pedal.

SFX: MMMEEEEE (I need to work on this sound effect)

[3] Extreme Close-up of KALI’s hand pressing needle to skin. Don’t forget her latex gloves.

No Copy

[4] Extreme Close-up of RYAN’s wide-eyed stare as the sensation hits him.

SFX: EEEEEEE

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Page twenty-one – 5 panels

[1] This panel will be the central image of the page. Ryan’s face in reality will be surrounded by the imagery swimming around in his mind. I see it as a collection of images in rough sketchy panels. This imagery will become more clear and vivid as the tattoo progresses. Anyway, this is a distorted perspective shot from below. It’s a lot like the first panel from the previous page with the camera tilted a bit to center on RYAN’s face. It’s almost like a fisheye shot from the floor. RYAN’s head is exaggerated in size and KALI’s head (bent down tattooing) is small and distant.

KALI: Doing all right?

SFX: EEEEEEEE

RYAN: GREAT. (this balloon will be at the bottom of the page, read after all the other panels)

[2] Extreme close-up of KALI’s lip. She’s biting it seductively.

No Copy

[3] Close-up of the nape of KALI’s neck. She’s holding a man’s hand there, pulling it down against her collarbone. Her head is tilting off in the opposite direction. If it matters, give her fancy dangling earrings and a low cut strapless dress

No Copy

[4] Close-up of KALI’s ass and lower back as she lies in a folding beach chair.

No Copy

[5] Close-up of KALI’s hand holding a champagne bottle. In the background, you can see her midsection. She’s wearing one of those elaborate corset things, white lacy panties and a white garter.

No Copy

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Page twenty-two – 3 panels

[1] Close-up from KALI’s perspective of her tattoo station. She’s dipping her machine in an ink cap and dipping her left hand in the glob of Vaseline on the bio mat. (I’ll definitely get you photo reference for this. It’s VERY important that we get all the tattoo stuff right. KALI can’t cross contaminate or do things out of order or anything. If she does, our credibility is shot).

KALI: So, what do you DO?

[2] Medium shot of KALI and RYAN. KALI is holding her hands over his shoulder, preparing to work again. RYAN is twisting his head around, in vain, to look at her.

RYAN: So there ARE interview questions.

KALI: Not a small talk man?

RYAN: I was trying to be clever. You know, bringing up previous-- Never mind. I’m an assistant manager. At Borders.

KALI: I didn’t ask where you work. I—

RYAN: I’m a sculptor. I make custom action figures, little statues, stuff like that.

[3] Low angle shot of a grinning KALI. This should be roughly from RYAN’s perspective. She’s still holding the Vaseline just above the skin, with the machine resting in her other hand.

KALI: That’s awesome. I like that. You should lose the bookstore gig. Doesn’t suit you.

[4] High angle shot of the same scene. RYAN has given up on looking at her and is talking to the floor.

RYAN: Wow.

KALI: Sorry. I’m a little too forward sometimes. And pithy and opinionated.

RYAN: No, it’s just. Most women don’t support careers that involve sculpting muscles on wee little man chests. My mother included.

KALI: Sorry to be the one to tell you this, but most women suck. No offense to your mother. Now hold still so I can poke on ya.

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Page twenty-three – 1 panel

[1] This is the visual representation of KALI pulling the essence of RYAN out of him with her tattoo machine. I have my vision of what it looks like, but if you have something better, go crazy. The canvas of the page is RYAN’s shoulder blade, pressed against the chair. In the top corner of the page, KALI’S tattoo machine is moving at a slight angle across the skin. Moving from the tip of the needle to the bottom left corner of the page is a jagged widening rip. It’s like she’s tearing him open and revealing what lies beneath. Within the rip is a collage off all the things that make up RYAN’s personality. Stacks of novels, a beat up spiral notebook, sculpting clay and tools, an airbrush, a sock monkey, random quotes, his headphones. Whatever. This isn’t the tattoo, it is her vision. To tie it all together, you might lay out the images in a loose spiral.

SFX: EEEEEEEE

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Page twenty-four – 4 panels

[1] Extreme close-up from the skin (as though a camera is mounted inside RYAN) of KALI’s intense face. The tattoo machine is in the foreground and she is in the background. She should more than fill the panel, like the edges are cramping her in. The next three pages represent the hours of tattooing that go into this love story. It will be a mish mash of her visions and his fantasies mixed up with real imagery of the work. I’m hoping it makes sense, but let me know if it doesn’t.

SFX: EEEEEEEE

[2] Tight close-up of a beat-up spiral notebook. Ryan is sketching vigorously. If you want, lay his iPod on one edge of the frame and make the song (or audio book) he’s listening to relate directly to the sketch.

SFX: EEEEEEEE

[3] Extreme close-up of RYAN wincing and clenching his teeth. The rest of the panel is filled with his tense shoulders. RYAN is cramped in this panel as KALI is cramped in the previous.

SFX: EEEEEEEE

[4] Tight shot of KALI’s head leaning back on a pillow with her hair spread out around her. Her eyes are bright and knowing. She’s biting her lip in just the same way she was in RYAN’s first fantasy.

SFX: EEEEEEEE

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Page twenty-five – 4 panels

[1] Tight shot from directly above them. Now, the two of them are cramped in a panel together.

SFX: EEEEEEEE

[2] Tight shot of KALI leaning her head back with a man’s hand held to her collarbone. This time, you can see a man in a suit standing behind her. She’s leaning against him, letting him touch her. This is intimate, but not terribly suggestive. These aren’t all about sex.

SFX: EEEEEEEE

[3] Tight shot of from beside them of Kali leaning far over RYAN’s back and getting VERY close to the tattoo.

SFX: EEEEEEEE

[4] Tight shot of a messenger-style book bag swinging from the shoulder of a young man. His jacketed arm is holding the bag to his hip as he walks. The top of the bag is open and the ragged spiral notebook can stick out the top. Two buttons and a patch are visible on the side of the bag. The buttons read NO IRAQ WAR and THE DISTILLERS. The patch read s I “heart” JUJY FRUITS.

SFX: EEEEEEEE

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Pages twenty-six and twenty-seven – 6 panels

[1] Two page splash split into angular panels that cut across both pages. This is where it starts to get frenetic. This panel is an extreme close-up of KALI’s station. Time has passed. The Vaseline glob is much smaller and smeared. One of the ink caps has spilled across the bio mat. Her ink-smeared left glove is just visible at the edge of the panel, pulling a damp paper towel over to her work.

SFX: EEEEEEEE

[2] Tight shot of KALI’s head peaking out over the top of a folding beach chair. Her hair is clipped up in a bunch at the back of her head. She’s tilting her head back to laugh and wearing dark oversized Diva sunglasses. If possible, put RYAN in the background. He’s kneeling beside the chair rubbing sunscreen on her back.

SFX: EEEEEEEE

[3] Tight shot of RYAN at about 8 years old. He’s hanging off the edge of his Twin bed, hugging a sock monkey tight to his chest. In the background, you can see crayon and pen drawings pinned to his wall. Each has a rough spiral ripped edge along the side.

SFX: EEEEEEEE

[4] Extreme close-up from above the tattoo machine. The perspective should be exaggerated significantly enough to make the machine look like an apocalyptic force.

SFX: EEEEEEEE

[5] High angle shot of RYAN in a suit standing at a funeral parlor pulpit, not crying but wanting to. He’s holding an open spiral notebook in one hand, and leaning over to speak into one of those bendable public speaking microphones. If you can see the content of the notebook page, make it more than just a eulogy written out. He worked out all of his aggressions on this page. In the background, a rose cover casket looms.

RYAN: Bye Dad.

SFX: EEEEEEEE

[6] Tight shot of KALI standing in a hotel doorway. She’s wearing a bride’s lingerie (white corset, lacey panties, garter) and a post-wedding veil. In one hand she holds a spurting champagne bottle, in the other two champagne flutes. She’s grinning a coy grin.

SFX: EEEEEEEE

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Page twenty-eight – 3 panels

[1] Medium shot of RYAN and KALI. KALI is leaning back away from him with her hands held up and out. In one hand she holds her machine (with the cord hanging down to her power supply), in the other a crushed paper towel. RYAN’s head is hanging limply on his shoulders. Both look exhausted.

KALI: Whew!

[2] Tight shot of RYAN’s head, still hanging limply on his shoulders. If it makes more sense, he can be half-heartedly craning to look at her.

RYAN: Oooh. So, um . . . You about ready to take a little break?

[3] Tight shot of KALI’s bio trashcan. The lid is up and her hand can be seen tossing the dirty paper towel.

KALI: No need . . .

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Page twenty-nine – 4 panels

[1] High angle shot just of the shop front. It’s dark now. FISH and LEX are sitting on the sidewalk leaning up against the front wall, smoking. RACE stands in front of them drinking a soda.

Caption 1: We’re done.

[2] Tight shot of FISH and LEX smoking. RACE’s mini skirted ass is in the foreground, splitting the shot in two. FISH is on one side of her ass, LEX is on the other.

FISH: Think we’ll close up on time tonight?

LEX: Who’s to say?

FISH: She has to be about done drilling Preppie Mc-Headphones back there.

LEX: Preppie? Did you just--

FISH: Had sort of a Zack Morris thing going on. And big ass head phones.

LEX: Ah.

[3] Tight, high angle shot from just beyond RACE. Her head and shoulders are in the foreground, framing LEX and FISH like little devils, one on each shoulder.

RACE: I think she likes him.

LEX: Kali? Likes his money, maybe.

FISH: See Race, that’s why we ask you not to verbalize your thoughts. It’s easier for everyone involved.

[4] Medium shot from the left of FISH and LEX’s bench. RACE is flogging her way through the door. FISH and LEX have resumed smoking and are paying her no mind.

RACE: Fuckers.

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Page thirty – 2 panels

[1] This panel should be about half the size of the one below it. The image is fun, but not as important as the last panel. RACE stands with her arms crossed, smiling and looking smug.

RACE: Hmph!

[2] This is it, the culmination of thirty pages of foreplay. Hopefully it works. RYAN’s naked back is facing us. KALI has her arms wrapped around him and is passionately kissing him. Her wrists are bent so as to avoid touching him with bio-smeared gloves. His sprawling shoulder is visible and stunning. Laying across Ryan’s shoulder blade and sprawling across his back is a stylized spiral-sketchbook. It is open to a page but not the first page. The cover and prior pages are flipped back behind, but maybe not laying perfectly flat behind it. They might even be holding it up an inch or two. Lying on the edge of the sketchbook is drawing utensils (pencil, pen, charcoal it depends on what you want the sketch to look like). Lying across the top corner of the book are Ryan’s big ass headphones. The sketch is of KALI’s face. I envision it as the only clear image, surrounded by guidelines or hatch marks. It is almost as though Kali is emerging from deep within the paper, the artist just had to pull her out.

Caption 1: End.

Wednesday
Aug242005

Forever Inc. the pitch

Well, this is it. What you see is what we sent to publishers. A smarter man would have written a dialogue heavy 5 page pitch script that played on mine and >h2o's talents, but what's done is done. I stand by the fact that this is a good script with great art. Hopefully at least one publisher agrees.

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Thursday
May262005

Post Toasties

>h20 posted this page on his own blog, but I spent 3 minutes scripting it so I'm gonna take partial credit. This is page one of INKED.

I know, right?